What to do Wednesday: The Gift of Gabbing

Dear Lesson Plan Toolbox,

I need your advice! I may have stepped into it BIG TIME and I'm not quite sure how to dig myself out. You see, a colleague and I were talking about a class that each of us has had in the past. I taught them two years ago and she just had them last year. Well, I did something I never do and I can't believe it! I told her how generous this class was with the gift they gave me for Christmas. One of the mom's organized a collection and bought me a gift card to my favorite store. Well, this teacher didn't have the same rapport with these students and families so the families didn't collaborate on a gift. In fact, she said she only received a handful of gifts. The conversation couldn't have been more awkward and now this teacher isn't speaking to me. I'm really not sure what to do.

I would appreciate any help that you can offer. Even if someone reads this and has an idea, I'd love to hear their advice too. I feel so bad. This was an innocent conversation that took a turn for the worst.

Sincerely,

The Gift of Gabbing

Dear The Gift of Gabbing,

After reading your post my first thought was, "Uh-oh!" However, I think I first want to tell you that it will be okay! If you are anything like me, which trust me I've been here before, this is ALL you are thinking about ALL the time. It may help in knowing though that time has a way of healing all things. Based on your description you did not set out to be boastful or malicious, but that's not how things were interpreted. So let's see how we can begin to correct this mishap.

My first suggestion is going to be rather obvious even though it may not be so easy. I would suggest simply apologizing and explaining your intentions. You are both adults and should be able to have a conversation about your conversation. I'm thinking that if you make the first move she might be more willing to listen. In fact, she herself might want to have a conversation with you but just isn't sure how to do it.

If for some reason you don't feel you can have a face to face conversation with the teacher, then try sending a text. Be very careful what you type and how your tone of voice is conveyed. Simply explain that you never meant to hurt her feelings. You assumed that the parents collaborated on her gift too, but you simply had a different rapport with these students and families. 

Finally, and this one might be difficult, but don't do anything. If you reach out and she doesn't accept the offering, then do nothing. You tried and that's all you can do. If anything, that would speak volumes about your colleague more so than it does about you. This isn't an easy choice because as teachers we are fixers but it's okay. You are still a great teacher. You probably have plenty of teacher friends. Some people just hold a grudge and there's not a whole lot you can do.

I am so happy that you reached out to us with your story because so often stuff like this builds up inside and we lash out unexpectedly. We truly hope that everything works out for you and your colleague. Please feel free to reach out to us on Instagram (@lessonplantoolbox) if you need any other ideas. We are always happy to serve teachers and make their lives easier.

Teach~Relax~Repeat

Lesson Plan Toolbox 

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